handmade highway

Monday, August 17, 2009

Items I sell on Ebay



I've been selling on Ebay for many years. It is a wonderful way to make extra money on items that your kids, yourself, friends and family out grow or do not want. I love shopping on ebay for cute clothes for my own kids with the money I make selling on Ebay.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Painful but True

Another great article written by hub member cindivine

Fear and the Abusive Relationship
When someone makes you afraid to be yourself, and afraid to control yourself so that you are available to be controlled by them, then you are a victim of abuse.
Outsiders don’t understand what an abused person actually goes through. They tend to generalise, play down the situation and blame the Victim, by making comments like, “They must like being abused or they would leave.”
“You are just a person who loves too much, so you brought it on yourself.”
“You have a low self-esteem so you don’t have the guts to leave.”
“You did something to provoke the abuse.”
“You over-exaggerate or make-up the abuse. It’s really not as bad as you say.”
“If your partner has a problem controlling their anger or stress, all you have to do is learn to keep out of their way.”
“Abused people all come from poor, low class, uneducated backgrounds, so it’s their lot in life.”
The truth is, nobody enjoys being abused, be it verbally, physically or mentally, no matter what your self-esteem is like. People who are into sado-masochism are just playing games and what we might call abuse is just a part of that game. The difference in a sado-masochistic game, is that both partners are willing players. In an abusive relationship, one partner is not a willing player, and is only staying in the game out of fear.
An interesting statistic, I don’t know about abused men, but I read somewhere that 70% of domestic assaults occur after the woman tries to leave, and one-half of all battered women murdered, are murdered after they leave. So, don’t judge someone who is staying in an abusive relationship. You don’t know what fears are keeping them there.

Top ten reasons we stay in bad relationships


FEAR
FEAR
FEAR
FEAR
FEAR
FEAR
FEAR
FEAR
FEAR
FEAR

It is sad but this is a truth that is unspoken by many. Its hard to understand why anyone would stay in an abusive relationship unless you yourself have walked in those shoes. Most abused woman do reach out to others for help, yet the are told things like, you are exaggerating the abuse, just stay out of his way, what did you do to make him so made, basically they are told to SUCK IT UP!! Which the abused woman internalizes as I deserve this its my fault and I cannot get anything better. The fear rises, hopelessness sets in and a feeling of numbness takes over. Sad,painful Truth.

Fear, Phobias and Frozen Feet

Fear, Phobias and Frozen Feet

This is a wonderful Article I love reading what this hubber cindivine has to say.

How do I know if I am in an abusive relationship?

How do I know if I am in an abusive relationship?

10 Signs that he/she is no good for you

10 Signs that he/she is no good for you

Relationships

When he/she never bothers to acknowledge your beauty, good looks, skills, intelligence - there's a good chance you'll end up being taken for granted. Everybody likes recognition and appreciciation and if you get neither, the lack of it will slowly eat into you like a cancer. The more you give, the more some people will take. You don't want to spend the rest of your life as a doormat.

I just read this great article and wanted to post this part of it. It is so true. Being in a loveless relationship can eat away at you. This article gives some top eye opener facts to whether or not you are in a good relationship or not. I added the link to the article for anyone who would like to read it.

http://hubpages.com/hub/10-Signs-that-heshe-is-no-good-for-you

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Autism Awareness

I have a friend who has a son with Autism. At one point they lived next door to me and I was very involved in there lives. My friends Autistic son took a strong grip on my heart. There is so much more to learn about Autism. I saw first hand, the effects of a special needs child on a family. I know that it can become very overwhelming and that the parents need help. Families that have special needs children need a large support group with open arms and non judgemental approach. The financial strain it puts on familys is so overwhelming. There are treatments out there to help with special needs but if you do not have the money what can you do. I watched a mother fight her way to getting help for her Autistic son.

An Autistic child who cannot speak for themselves needs someone to do that for them. Who better than the person/persons who know him best and love him unconditional. This mother struggled to recieve the services that her some needed to thrive. She was not going to stand back and let him slip through the cracks.

She went to the school for meetings to help her son recieve what he needed. They fought her hard, and basically it came down to the school could not afford to provide the needs for her son. At one point during the meeting a comment was said that I feel is so very unprofessional and absolutely cruel. One of the people at the meeting said "I know that there are some people at this meeting that just do not like you," I'll stop there. I was so infuriated when I heard what was said to her.

I become so upset for her. I told her that she should of said (easy for me to say), I am not here to make friends I am here for my son who cannot speak for himself. If I do not speak up and fight for what I have been told will benefit him, then who will. Obviously not any of you who are passing judgement on me. I said a whole lot more but I just kept it short and sweet here ;0)

I could not believe the lack of awareness there was in my town when it came to Autism. My friends son, would become so upset he would bang his head extremly hard on the floor, wall window, hard toys, our knees back ect. One time he hit the window so hard with his head he broke it. That was terrifying. My point is, how can anyone expect a parent who's child with this kind of behavioral issues to sit back and not get the help that can improve their quality of life.

At age 6 her son was still not potty trained, she has a 10 year old son who is a highly functioning Autistic child and a 2 year old daughter. So you can imagine the weight of the world this woman felt on her shoulders. My heart broke for her, I felt anger like I've never felt before. I was taking a powerpoint class at my local community college and chose to do my final exam on Autism Awareness. It so happened to be the month of April Which is actually Autism Awareness Month. I just wanted to share this story, in hopes to open more eyes. I cannot sit back and turn a blind eye, or ear to a child or family who need to be seen with love and heard with love. THROW THE JUDGEMENT IN THE GARBAGE WHERE IT BELONGS PEOPLE!!! A constant thought in my mind is always this "Only God can Judge me so who am I to judge another when I am not perfect?" COMPASSION, we need a whole lot more of it.

Thank you,
Christina

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Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Momlogic

Here is one of my favorite places to visit and meet other blogging mothers. Working Moms, stay at home moms, work at home moms, you name we are there. There are so many different and interesting articles to read. Come on by and check us all out and join the many different bloggers and website that Momlogic has to offer.

Numb Linkin Park lyrics

Numb



i'm tired of being what you want me to be

feeling so faithless

lost under the surface

i don't know what you're expecting of me

put under the pressure

of walking in your shoes

[caught in the undertow / just caught in the undertow]

every step that i take is another mistake to you



i've

become so numb

i can't feel you there

become so tired

so much more aware

i'm becoming this

all i want to do

is be more like me

and be less like you



can't you see that you're smothering me

holding too tightly

afraid to lose control

cause everything that you thought i would be

has fallen apart right in front of you



[caught in the undertow / just caught in the undertow]

every step that i take is another mistake to you

[caught in the undertow / just caught in the undertow]

and every second i waste is more than i can take



but i know

i may end up failing too

but i know

you were just like me

with someone disappointed in you



Return to my Linkin Park lyrics page

The lyrics are Copyright their respective owners.

I love this song

A moment with you

A soft embrace
a moment to erase

I will not replace the memory of you
A laughter strong and true
an echo in my mind

Tender voices
whispered dreams
crushed with open seams

Mend my heart
I hold the needle
slowly stitching closed the wound
painful at first yet I know it will heal

Time passed by
a vague embrace
a soft hand not able to replace

I would give my life to have another moment with you
to feel your arms around me my head on your chest
the soft beating of you heart

My tears flowing freely
a wet stain I will leave

To hear your voice
the words I long to hear
that I am loved
I am not forgotten

I would give my life for just one moment with you
my misty memories I will hold onto
in fleeting moments of pain I will long for you
The stitches of my heart will heal yet there will always be a scar.

Written by: Christina Kirksey

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Club Pogo online game site

I am addicted to playing on Pogo. I love it. You can play so many different games, earn badges, earn tokens to buy stuff and win prizes. One of the highlights I think is creating your own mini me. You can make it your own. Your mini can be as close to what you really look like or outrages and unique.

As much as I enjoy playing on pogo I have run into an issue that really is bugging me. I was on pogo wanting to play scrabble against another player. If you are familiar with Pogo, after you click on the game you want to play the next page gives you several options. These options are highlighted by tabs or buttons you click on to customize your game playing.

The other day I clicked on the game Scrabble then clicked on the two player tab (again wanting to play against another actual player rather than a robot). Well, I wait for the game to load and take me to a room. Each member playing room has a host. The host is the person already inside the room. When another player enters you have to wait for the host to give you permission to join the game. The issue I have run into is the hosts not allowing you to join, so eventually I have to end up playing against a robot.

The other day I entered a two player room and waited to see if the host would let me join. There is a place for room chatting. This is a section on the game page that lists the players, their profiles and you can chat back and forth. Chat consists of simple stuff like GG (good game) N1 (nice one) and so on. Well, as I'm waiting up pops a message in the chat section from the host and this is what it read; GET OUT!! LEAVE ME ALONE!!

I was so shocked when I saw this. I calmly responded to the host asking; Why? I just wanted to understand why this player was being so hostile. She responded; "I AM TRYING TO TEST MY SKILLS GET OUT SO I CAN PLAY." Ok, I think and respond, "You do know that on the first page there is an option to play against robots. This is a room for members who want to play against another member?" Her response was to still not let me play and she ended up playing against a robot but in a two person member room. I left, baffled and played against a robot.

I guess my point is HELLO POEPLE read the directions of how the game works. If you want to play alone and test your skills choose the robot option so that other members who want to actually play against another member can have a room to play in. Maybe you think this is petty I don't know but it really bugged me. It happens alot (minus the GET OUT LEAVE ME ALONE) expecially in the game of scrabble.

Has anyone else experienced this before? What is your opinion on a hostile room hogger who does not understand the options of playing the hundreds of games on pogo?

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

EMDR How it works

I recently learned about EMDR. It is a very interesting treatment for post tramatic stress disorder. EMDR stands for Eye movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. Here is a link to information on this treatment for trauma; http://www.emdr.com/briefdes.htm

EMDR is found to help desensitize a person to a traumatic event they experienced. There are things that will trigger the traumatic event and the person relives the feelings/emotions. This article helps explain this; http://www.emdr.com/theory.htm

EMDR helps to reprogram your brain and desensitize you to a traumatic event. EMDR can help with issues rangeing from being teased in school as a child or help with Rape victims.

It seems amazing to me that we can actually reprogram our memories to eleviate painful events that cause disfunctions in our lives. Imagine that as a child you are molested, in the childs mind they may believe they are bad or dirty (just an example)that child grows up into an adult and the thought process is still "I am bad", "I am dirty", the effect of this negetive thinking has a huge impact on the quality of life for this person. To be able to retrain your brain from negetive thoughts of yourself to positive is Wonderful. You will have to revisit that little child who was hurt, and give that child the power and strength they deserve. Desensitize yourself to that pain and realize the truth of the traumatic event. What a Wonderful thing, the quality of life for that person would be greatly improved. To be given a chance to live in truth.

I just wanted to share on this topic, because I think it is very interesting. I would love your input on the topic.

Monday, August 3, 2009

How to deal

How does one deal with the loss of a loved one? We all do in our own way. I am 32 years old the age my own mother died. My eldest daughter is 11 years old the same age I was when she died. Well, she died in Oct. and I was ten, my birthday is in Dec. so 10 1/2 years old really. Anyway, I find myself in a scary place. I guess the reality of just how younge my mother was when she died is hitting me. Looking at my own daughter and thinking WOW, I was that tender age when I lost my mother. The fear I feel is of my own girls having to experience the pain and confusion I did. I don't want that for them. I cherish my girls more because of this. I can put myself in their shoes and I can relate.

I want my girls to know that they are loved and perfect as they are. I don't want them to feel like they do not have a place to fit. My arms, my heart the very soul of me is where they fit. There is no love like a mothers love. I have never recieved the unconditional love I had from my own mother until now, here in this moment as a mother myself. My children love me unconditionally and that is such a precious gift. I am blessed. I am still dealing with the loss of my mother. I felt it stronge and hard when I became pregnant with my first daughter. Desperately wanting someone to share in my excitement and fear. I chose to write a diary of letters to my mother and this helped relieve the anxiety,pain and fear I was feeling. I gave my first daughter my mothers middle name to honor her memory. She is forever going to not be a grandmother, confidant, friend, and mother. This pain is deep. I mourn the loss of my mother even several years later. My mothers death was tragic. She had cervical cancer. A very treatable type of cancer. She had a hyserctomy, and under went chemo and radiation. Unfortunately, my mothers doctor overdosed her on the chemo and radiation and this caused her death. I will post more on this later. I just wanted to share how we can savor memories and continue to make memories. Cherish your loved ones, savore the moments you share and do not take them for granted. You never know what will be your last moment, so make them all good ones.

Thank you,
Christina

Memories of my mother

Its funny how a song can trigger a memory and create a new memory. I was driving with my 3 daughters the other day and a song came on, maybe you know it, "I love Rock and Roll put another dime in the juke box baby". I clearly remember as a younge girl about 8 years old driving in the back seat of my mothers car and this song being on. We sang to it my mother and I. I loved that song what kid wouldn't. Skip to today me at my age 32 (the age my mother died) in the car with my own 3 daughters listening to the same song and singing it. My eldest daughter (11 years old the age I was when my mother died) sits in the front seat with me. I take a moment to share my memory with my girls and hope one day they will have this memory to share like I do today.

Step by step

Painful dreams
memories schemed
a mountain of emotion I hold in me

When did I become so hollow,
lost in a mist of dreams
a mere puppet on strings

Break free my mind screams
climb out of your shell
let your soul fly free, soar into the unknown

A break in my heart a sore untended
a fever spreading through me
A quenching pain that rips
tears, and scars me

Blindly I fumble through this world
trying to find my way
Tired of feeling lost

climb the mountain step by step
clawing my way through thick muddle thoughts
the top never in view lost in a swirl of misty clouds
Where is the sun, the heat my shining star

Break through the mist,
show me the way
Strengthen my heart

I trudge harder still
climbing the mountain step by step
trying to make my way

To be lifted
gracefully held
strength below me
around me
inside me

I will climb my mountain step by step
and continue through another day.

Written by:
Christina Kirksey
A dreamer

The poet in me

I use to write poetry like it was food that quench my hunger. I miss it. So, I am going to start writing again. I hope everyone enjoys reading my poems. I enjoy writing poetry that will stir up emotions in people. I love music and my favorite part of it is the words. A song tells a story has a meaning and that is poetry. Please feel free to leave me your input and thoughts on my writing and if you have a request, I am more than happy to write you a poem. I used to do this in high school with friends. They would tell me their situation (back then it was boyfriends) and I would write them a poem.

Enjoy

Christina